You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
