R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Randomize