1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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