Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
