idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
this beer tastes like vomit already
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
