some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
we're so committed to being not committed
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