I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I forget how to act sober
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
