if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
