Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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