I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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