i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
