Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
