I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
sex in a hospital.. check
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
