you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize