I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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