It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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