My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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