just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
