Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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