chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
