umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
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She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
What a dumb baby whore.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
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My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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