oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
