dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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