You don't have asthma, your pregnant
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize