worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
my god I love twenty year old dicks
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
