You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
