Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
NoShamevember. You game?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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