I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Hippo gnu deer
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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