im holly from the hills drunk
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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