Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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