brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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