we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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