You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
