Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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