when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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