chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
