my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
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just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
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I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
So here I am, sexting at work.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
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