C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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