win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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