I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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