So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
