nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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