Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just want to make out with him forever
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
