Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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