so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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