Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(406): View more from Montana

I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.

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(406): I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea. http://tfl.nu/bq8d

Replies (7) Good night (1625) Bad night (694)
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(407): View more from Florida

I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes

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(407): I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes http://tfl.nu/atny

Replies (1) Good night (746) Bad night (1087)
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(563): View more from Iowa

that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.

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(563): that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark. http://tfl.nu/i86g

Replies (13) Good night (1103) Bad night (2343)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.

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(215): You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid. (215): While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here. http://tfl.nu/jz3m

Replies (17) Good night (588) Bad night (2406)
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(802): View more from Vermont

he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him

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(802): he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him http://tfl.nu/grpf

Replies (14) Good night (750) Bad night (5100)
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(573): View more from Missouri

how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?

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(573): how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain? http://tfl.nu/ptj1

Replies (7) Good night (3260) Bad night (625)
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(865): View more from Tennessee

Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class

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(865): Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class http://tfl.nu/v047

Replies (37) Good night (4809) Bad night (591)
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(540): View more from Virginia

I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments

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(540): I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments http://tfl.nu/peng

Replies (7) Good night (5950) Bad night (762)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally

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(484): seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally http://tfl.nu/s3gk

Replies (25) Good night (2550) Bad night (1286)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.

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(719): Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon. http://tfl.nu/ncwf

Replies (8) Good night (2176) Bad night (780)
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(954): View more from Florida

I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?

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(954): I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol? http://tfl.nu/ys8s

Replies (15) Good night (1953) Bad night (892)
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(206): View more from Washington

Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.

(1-206): View more from Washington

That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.

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(206): Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night. (1-206): That is the scariest sentence I have ever read. http://tfl.nu/zqtn

Replies (6) Good night (1657) Bad night (383)
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(408): View more from California

its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat

(1-408): View more from California

your picture is with misty too!!

(408): View more from California

I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE

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(408): its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat (1-408): your picture is with misty too!! (408): I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE http://tfl.nu/688p

Replies (1) Good night (708) Bad night (267)
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(571): View more from Virginia

If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.

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(571): If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies. http://tfl.nu/9cow

Replies (3) Good night (520) Bad night (242)
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(909): View more from California

Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.

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(909): Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work. http://tfl.nu/qyvz

Replies (2) Good night (288) Bad night (562)

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