I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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