Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
