Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
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Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
If I die, sorry about rent.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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