My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
