dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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